Seven

I'm the last child my parents had. The "baby" as people like to say. I'm the seventh child.

My next-oldest sister enjoyed "baby of the family" status for five glorious years until I showed up. She likes to tell people that "We were The Brady Bunch until Heather came along and screwed everything up." Obviously, she's still not over losing her title. We hated each other growing up and now we're best friends. I still want to belt her when she makes the Brady Bunch comment, though.

So I came along and six became seven. Lucky number seven? Meh. Probably not. I think seven kids pretty much torched the last of my mom's sanity. In family pictures, she looks like she held it together right up until kid number five, then you see the screws coming loose. By the time I arrived, she was OVER. IT. Every picture of her after my birth, she's practically climbing out of the frame. I just have two kids and I can't say that I blame her.

Instead of The Brady Bunch, we became the Seven Dwarves. At least, that's what everyone hooted when they heard "seven kids." "Harharharhar! Seven kids! You're the seven dwarves! HARHARHAR!" Yeah. That never gets old. And it wasn't enough just to point out the Snow White connection. Idiots who point that kind of crap out always have to ask, "SO! Which dwarf are you?!"

May I use this opportunity to educate you? Thanks.

Snow White and the Seven Dwarves is a very old story. It goes back to the middle 1800's at least. In some versions, the dwarves are knights. Mostly, they're just short dudes who let Snow White crash with them in exchange for cooking and cleaning. The dwarves weren't named until that Disney came along. Suddenly, every dwarf needed a name. Every dwarf needed a label. Bashful, Doc, Dopey, Grumpy, Happy, Sleepy and Sneezy. Well, fine.

So when people asked us which dwarf we were, my brothers were all too happy to start throwing labels around. Guess who got to be Dopey each and every time? Harumph.

A Mystery Wrapped in an Enigma

So, I suppose I should explain why this blog is named "Three Out of Seven". I could tell you outright, but what would be the fun in that?

Instead, in honor of my mystery loving Grandmother, I'll give you some clues in future posts to help you figure it out. The first person to figure out the name of the blog will win a $25 Amazon gift certificate. That goes for any currency! So Canadians could win $25 Canadian, Brits could win...well, I can't find the fancy pound sign on my keyboard, but you get the idea. If you live in Mexico or Japan, I'll make sure you get more than 25 pesos or yen. 'Cause that would buy you, what, not even a beer?

So, read the blog, enjoy, and e-mail me or comment when you think you've figured it out. Only the Grinch knows the story behind the blog name and he'll keep me honest. When the name is figured out, I'll post the reason and the winner.

Good luck and happy reading between the lines!