Dear Thursday,
Why you gotta be like that? Acting all crazy and flat out nasty sometimes. What'd I do to you?
We used to have a good thing going, you and me. You were practically my favorite day of the week. After Friday, I mean. Settle down, settle down. You gotta know that Friday is everyone's favorite. It's just the way the calendar is set up. Friday starts the weekend. Friday is party night. Friday is date night. Friday is pay day. TGIF and all that.
But you, Thursday? You're the pat on the back, the sign that relief is close, the appetizer to the weekend's main course. Thursday means the weekend is so close. Hang in there, baby! It's Thursday! Hey, it's Thursday, wanna get a jump start on the weekend? Thursday, YOU are the beacon of light in a long week.
Except for me. Technically you're my Tuesday. Now, now...I know Tuesday is the weakling on the calendar. Nobody thinks twice about Tuesday. "Whatcha doin' Tuesday?" "Nothin'." And it's not my fault, really. I had nothing to do with screwing up the week like that. Believe me, I want things back to the way they used to be but it's not up to me. For now, to me anyway, you're Tuesday. I'm sorry, sugar, that's just the way it has to be. At least you're not Wednesday. Wednesday has become my Monday and NOBODY likes Monday. Think how Wednesday feels. See. You got it pretty good.
So why gotta act like that, Thursday? By the time I'm done with you I want to eat my weight in chocolate, break shit, lay on the floor and cry. Seriously. Can't we just have a normal day together? One that doesn't involve illness or sleepless babies or cantankerous toddlers? I know, I know...I'm not blaming it all on you. Some of this is my fault, but day-um. EVERY THURSDAY ends in tears for somebody at my house and it's usually me.
Shhhhh. It's ok, baby. I didn't mean to make you cry. Com'ere. It's gonna be ok. I still love you. Everybody else still loves you, too. You're beautiful, friendly, never-hurts-anyone Thursday. Ain't nothin' gonna change that. Let's make up, ok? Wanna go get a burrito? The place up the street has a Thursday speeccciaaaaalllllll......
Showing posts with label Open Letter. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Open Letter. Show all posts
Thursday, October 2, 2008
Sunday, October 21, 2007
It's Not You...It's Not Her, Either
Dear Family, Friends and Strangers,
You won't be the one to make my little girl smile. She won't shake your hand or give you a high five. She won't giggle at your silly faces or take a lollipop from you. She won't tell you her name or wave bye-bye. Please don't take it personally, that's just the way she is right now.
Yes, she smiles and talks. She sings, plays, laughs uproariously and even cracks jokes. She does all of this when she's with her daddy and me. She does all these things when she knows she's safe and she doesn't feel like she's on display. She's not a performer. She's a little kid. Just let her be the little kid she is. She's quite happy that way and so are we.
Back in the dark ages of child rearing (10-15 years ago), you probably would have called her "shy." You still can, but we don't. We say she's cautious. (The pediatrician suggested that term and we like it.) Our little girl isn't rejecting you, she's just getting to know you before she lets you get too close. Pretty smart, actually. Oh, and the getting to know you part? It can take a long time.
I know it's frustating for you, the grandparents who want to bond with their granddaughter, the strangers who protest, "But kids LOVE me!" It's been frustrating for us, too. I shed a lot of tears over this but I finally figured out that my frustration wasn't helping her, and that's what I really need to do. You can think my child is weird, you can think all you want about my parenting skills, that her "shyness" is all my fault. I don't really care. I know my daughter. I know what makes her feel safe, what makes her feel accepted, and what makes her feel comfortable. I'll take care of all that. Let my little girl be herself.
Here's a novel idea: you be yourself, too. Stop trying so hard to be an instant best friend or favorite grandparent to our little Bug. Relax. Let her figure out where she stands with you. Be yourself. If you're an ok person, she'll let you in and we'll all be happy.
Thanks,
The Mother of the Quiet Kid
You won't be the one to make my little girl smile. She won't shake your hand or give you a high five. She won't giggle at your silly faces or take a lollipop from you. She won't tell you her name or wave bye-bye. Please don't take it personally, that's just the way she is right now.
Yes, she smiles and talks. She sings, plays, laughs uproariously and even cracks jokes. She does all of this when she's with her daddy and me. She does all these things when she knows she's safe and she doesn't feel like she's on display. She's not a performer. She's a little kid. Just let her be the little kid she is. She's quite happy that way and so are we.
Back in the dark ages of child rearing (10-15 years ago), you probably would have called her "shy." You still can, but we don't. We say she's cautious. (The pediatrician suggested that term and we like it.) Our little girl isn't rejecting you, she's just getting to know you before she lets you get too close. Pretty smart, actually. Oh, and the getting to know you part? It can take a long time.
I know it's frustating for you, the grandparents who want to bond with their granddaughter, the strangers who protest, "But kids LOVE me!" It's been frustrating for us, too. I shed a lot of tears over this but I finally figured out that my frustration wasn't helping her, and that's what I really need to do. You can think my child is weird, you can think all you want about my parenting skills, that her "shyness" is all my fault. I don't really care. I know my daughter. I know what makes her feel safe, what makes her feel accepted, and what makes her feel comfortable. I'll take care of all that. Let my little girl be herself.
Here's a novel idea: you be yourself, too. Stop trying so hard to be an instant best friend or favorite grandparent to our little Bug. Relax. Let her figure out where she stands with you. Be yourself. If you're an ok person, she'll let you in and we'll all be happy.
Thanks,
The Mother of the Quiet Kid
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